Entry #9: Helping the Helpless

The other night I was coming home from Philly, when we passed a poor misfortunate homeless man holding a sign that said 'Homeless, going anywhere.' Naturally I asked if I could pick him up. The passengers in my car all responded with a quick no, shooting my idea straight down in an instant. While, driving my head was whirling with thoughts. My first thought though was that someday I was going to get another person to go with me and we were going to actually pick up a hobo. Now I know what you're thinking, 'your car is going to smell,' or the most common response, 'the hobo is going to kill you,'. Well I'd like to beg to differ. There are a few possibilities that I could think of actually playing out. The first one would go kind of like this. Find a hobo. Pull up to him asking if he wants a ride. Hobo is so dumbstruck that he says never mind and walks away thinking completely astounded by the fact that someone actually was going to pick him up. In all honesty if I were a hobo I wouldn't have planned for a situation to arise. In fact I would tell the nice driver, 'I didn't think anyone would actually pick me up. I think I'm going to go rethink my life now,' and then clean myself up, write a resume, and get a quality job at McDonalds. That is situation one. Now unto situation number two. Find a hobo. Pull up to him and ask if he wants a ride. Hobo says yes, throws his stuff in the trunk and hops in the back. You begin talking, the conversation gets awkward and is soon followed by a long awkward silence, and then the hobo decides the silence is literally tearing him apart so he does a barrel roll out of you car, cleans himself up, writes a resume, and gets a quality job at McDonalds. Now onto the third and most convincing situation that will show you that optimism trumps crazy killer hobo theories. Situation number three. Find a hobo. Pull up and ask him if he needs a ride. He throws his stuff in the trunk and hops in the back seat. Now, originally he plans on slitting your throat and stealing your identity. However, right before he pulls out the knife a thought goes through his head. 'This man, out of the kindness of his heart, picked me up off the streets. Today he need not fear my blade,' and then a beautiful thing happens. You and the hobo form a beautiful relationship where you learn all about each other. You take him into your home, toilet train him, shower him, and realize his true inner beauty. The two of you cooperate and formulate a plan to start up a multibillion dollar company. The company takes off and the two of you are rich. Thats the ideal situation. Now onto situation number four. He gets in your car and kills you. It's a matter of perspective. Is the glass half full or half empty?