Entry #10: The Internet is for Porn

Well folks this is what I've degraded to. Taking suggestions from idiots who suggest writing about porn and its influences in the 21st century. Sadly, I actually care about my fan (or lack thereof) so I will appeal to their inappropriate tastes. I guess the best place I can start with this one is the introduction of porn. Since the beginning of man the human instinct of sticking one vile organ into another has been imbedded in all of us (women included), yet the idea of paying to watch others 'do the dirty' came about with the invention of cinema. My main time period of study is ancient mesopotamia up through the renaissance so don't quote me on any other time after that. So that being said, time to continue. Once the invention of moving pictures came about, it was only a matter of time before some pervert decided to point the camera at two people doing it. I mean think about it. It all started with the moving pictures of a horse running. Two stubborn fools with too much free time got in an argument as to whether or not a horse is constantly connected to the earth or if at any point in their run all four of their legs leave the ground at the same time. So they set up a row of cameras attached to strings that would trigger them to go off as the horse went by. Who won the bet I couldn't tell you, well I could if I wasn't too lazy to google it. Anywho, after tapping the horse people started taping scenes at train stations, parks, public places, and then the perverts came along and took the camera to a darker more intimate location. The idea was genius. They would film the 'dirty deeds' and then charge people to watch it. What could possibly go wrong? Sadly, the thing that went wrong was the invention of the internet. Of course the internet started with things such as basic messaging, a few websites, and a dictionary. And yet again the perverts entered the field and started sending their dirty works into the cyber world. When it first started out people actually paid for it online too. It was amazingly profitable, hence why so many people put it on there. However all good things are meant to come to a close. Eventually people started finding free websites to get their fix so the paid porn industry started tanking. Nowadays we even have a saying, 'the internet is for porn' (it's a really catchy song, you should totally look it up). The sad fact of it is that 1% of the internet is actual fact, 9% is made up wikipedia information, and the last 90% is porn. Lets face it, in the end those primitive perverts were right all along. They actually had two things right. The first thing being that humans will forever go around sticking one bodily organ into another. And the second being, if you have it on tape your video will go viral in a matter of minutes. A word to the wise, start a porn site, sell some advertisement banners to companies, get a couple of buddies or are comfortable with their bodies, and start producing some videos. Who knows, the stock market could fail, the internet could get shut down, and people will have to go back to paying for porn.